I've been stressing, and posting, and procrastinating, and more stressing while editing to get my first YouTube. Am I proud of it? Nope. But it's out there because I wanted to hit a posting schedule / deadline that I created for myself.
Am I disappointed in myself? Honestly, kinda? (and don't yell at me that I shouldn't be plz). I didn't use FinalCut because my computer was crashing. I felt juvenile on CapCut but proceeded anyway. And I KNOOOOW that everyone starts somewhere, and according to The Front Bottoms everyone blooms, BUT I'm the type of delulu that thinks that I have to hit homeruns right away when it comes to content. And isn't that my folly? Of course it is.
I've been getting messages all day about how it's a great first vlog and I'm natural with my face in a camera but just like Lit, I'm My Own Worst Enemy. I'm super appreciative of the warm and welcoming messages. And I'm grateful that 112 people have watched my antics plus 23 humans have subscribed for the ride to come. I'm really excited to have the opportunities that I do when it comes to events, activities, happenings, etc and now it's about buckling up / being a big girl when it comes to my pride. I know that not everything I create will be perfect and the pressure that I (and I alone) put on myself in this space is not reasonable. Like, I'm supposed to and am this fun lil, funky beer girlie with a literal giant voice...it's really not that serious.
However...I will be recreating my first ever vlog aka BLUE POINT'S CASK FEST 2023 because I'm nothing if not a mini perfectionist but also nervous shawty who is second guessing her original edit. STAY TUNED AND THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE.
XO, ABA.
